Never shake hands with a naked Norristownonian

So, many of you are asking yourself, “Why Chez T?” Many of you others are probably asking yourselves, “Why should I care?” The remainder of you are probably asking yourselves, “Do I have to be subjected to another boring blog post?”

To the first of you I offer this story:

When I was a wee lad of some 21, 22 or so, I had me a Little Sister. And she had this friend, Julie, who subsequently became my friend (as long as I continued to sacrifice to her vengeful god, Kala the Grasshopper God, on the 5th Saturday of every February--geez, that’s coming up soon isn’t it?) These two girls were a curious pair of Norristownonians. If you’ve ever been to Norristownonia or met a Norristownonian, you’d know just what I’m talking about. Well, I had this ferret, see? And his name was Lin Ho, Your Sister, She is a Pig. I also believe, at the time, we accidentally cracked open one claw of our fraternity lobster, Rock, and, after that, we drank beer through the missing appendage out of Rock’s body. Kinda nasty, really. I think I was the only one who really did it.

Well, one day, Mary suggested I drink out of my ferret, Lin Ho, Your Sister, She is a Pig. Weird, because that would have involved drinking out of a LIVE animal and not a broken plastic toy replica of a sea creature. I told you there was something odd about those Norristownonians. Nonetheless, having NOT drunk out of little Lin Ho, Your Sister, She is a Pig at the time, Mary suggested, as a substitute, a nickname for me, Chez T. She then suggested I do a little diagram as to HOW to drink out of a ferret for posterity’s sake. Here is the story:

Wait, I...uh...just told you the story...

Anyway, the name Chez T may also be related to the fact that I like to cook. Am I good cook? Ask any Norristownonian YOU know.

Just don’t turn your back on one of them--or look one straight in the eye, trust me.